Feeling guilty.

Feeling guilty
that everything
is neither right
nor wrong
because someone is hurting
and someone is happy
and there is guilt
that lives within me
larger it gains
with a thought
a thought, thought by me
a thought, thought by you
a thought, thought by them
a thought, thought by they
it is a thought
and I get ruffled
slipping through the cracks
that are opening
trying to hold on to the edge
as the guilt it grows
heavily I am
my fingers give up
falling I am
as the guilt
of right
and the guilt of wrong
it lives
it breathes
it multiplies
and I cannot breath
my airway restricts
and my brain struggles
to the tune of my heart
am I right
am I wrong
am I one of the many
burrowing us deeper
can I be better
what is better
is anything better
or is better just a thought
an opinion
if I think it
it’s right to me
and yet wrong to you
I cannot stop
this feeling
so deep
as I fall
and I fall
I struggle to regain calm
although I’ve never felt it
so if I reached it
would I know if I am?

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

Why fight for more when we’re already failing?

Abortion is murder

Alright, sure I’ll give you that.
But what about the bodies already here?
You know the kids already living?
The adults that once were
a cluster of cells
and now they’re a full blown person
losing their sanity,
you’re telling them to have more babies?

Abortion is murder, they’re all murderers! Prochoice are all the same.

Yes we are,
and so are you
every time you fight
for an unborn life
your fighting for one more
soon to be full grown person
flustered on Earth
standing with a rifle
outside of a school
outside of a market.
Rather why not fight here on the grounds
right now
right here and say
every life alive today
outside the womb
needs to be helped
their minds saved.
Why not focus on
what’s already here
try and stop the bloodshed
outside of wombs
you know the ones that can survive
on the outside.
Why fight for more
when we’re already failing?

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

I can’t think of anything as correct.

I can’t think of anything as correct
and there are no words
that are worth pain
that are worth my heart stopping
or a mouth from speaking
no words worth quitting
there are no words
worth hitting
you can speak
you can think
and when I get flustered
it’s my minds inability
to filter
your lead written words
there is no terms
that are definite
we speak of facts
and I utter opinion
it’s fucking opinion
it all is
it all has been
we’re buzzing around
with our asses out
feeling the sting
of each other
and it’s like look
listen it doesn’t matter
I’ll take a breath
you take a breath
if I quit over words
that’s on me
if you quit
that’s on you.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

Bathe within our own thoughts.

If we serve ourselves first
fill our ears with the sounds
that allow the nerves to relax
massage the tightness from our backs
and bathe within our own thoughts
we can awaken
with our own self clarity
and whomever is left struggling
we together
will be ready to help
otherwise we will fail
because we cannot provide calm
we cannot provide mental clarity
we cannot
if we ourselves
haven’t tended
to the little thoughts
fluttering about our heads
they’ll provoke us
if we stay unaware of their intentions.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

I’ve been called selfish

I’ve been called selfish
self centered
stuck within myself
countless times
over the decades of my life
It’s a humorous statement
because as you gather your thoughts
you must stay calm
and rationalize those words
because if someone speaks them
you know and they know
that they’re also selfish
and you are to them
simply just a body that exists
to swarm them
and whichever words you take
it won’t change their thought
because they’re not ready to evolve either.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

The only definitive of life.

The only definitive of life I can give is death
to be termed alive
would mean that death is possible
as far as an inanimate object
incapable of death.

Bacteria it isn’t animal like
incapable of thought like you or I
although a complexity of decisions
is plausible
because life knows to grow
and it inherits the ability
to grow
it’s living
because it can reach death
which determines life
which for us
it triggers morality
because we debate life
although we know if it’s killing us
it must die.

An unborn life
in a womb
is capable of death
which in terms it is living
rather we wrestle within the thought
of which life
shall stride on
if it is unable to survive
outside of its incubator
then why do we struggle
with the morality
it is life
it is alive
only in the womb
do we neglect the incubator
as if it is only a box of warmth
rather than flesh itself?

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

The struggle of thought.

I can be within a thought
that every moment is intense
and each should be cherished
then within the moment after
I drift within the pointlessness
the struggle of thought
of the ability to think
are thoughts more valuable then others?

Do other animals think
or is the capability of thought
regulated to humans
does that mean we are the most intelligent
or is thought itself what destroys us
hyperventilating at the thought of morals
hurting feelings
hurting within myself
hurting the animals scattered about
do they feel the pain
as my feet crush upon their bodies
a simple blip to me
I wonder do they have thoughts?

Are my thoughts that of intelligence
are they weakness
are they strength
I feel rather weak
as my heart hurts
and my lungs struggle to take in air
all the pressure
all the struggles of life
I think it
I struggle to understand it
I keep living
because the idea of nothing
is terrifying.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

I think

I think.
Every second is a thought,
every moment is many.
I’m changing within each hour
because these thoughts are bulky
erupting within my mind.
My views they start over
every time another speaks.
I must rethink,
try again.
Trying to be polite
as I rarely understand
rarely grasp
what the many say.
I listen
I interrupt
because I need to speak
before I forget.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

I am guilt.

I know I live within complaint
my mind cannot understand
what others see
what others hear
what others respond to
and it sends you within shut down
you don’t want to hear it
you’re not one
to drown within a puddle of thoughts
you’re not one to fill with the angst of another
you’re stronger
more secure
I am guilt
that’s all I’ve ever been
all I’ve felt
weak, sad
filling of guilt
for what I cannot control
dripping of tears
for what I cannot control
their opinions are
and mine remain the same
often doused of theirs
if I lit a match
it’d go up in smoke
and I’d be left
wallowing there
feeling the pain
of burnt flesh
you’d dust of your skin
and grow again
I am not strong
I feel it all
my brain absorbs it
and I struggle
because I cannot stop it
all of it
all of the societal problems
created by humans
by myself
by all of us
I cannot stop it
and that in itself
is what holds me down.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina

New is a longing.

Will it ever be
as I want it to be?
Each word shitter
than the last
and I’m stuck
new ideas
never finished
left partially executed
slipping out of the brain
the pages not empty
although the words
re-read come out pointless
new is a longing
in which keeps me deleting
switching because
different is a difficulty
in which I’m trying
and I’m feeling is impossible
and I can’t settle for the same
only twisted bits
I’m looking
for entirely new
and I’m not sure
if I can.

I’ve been trying to work on a story recently in which I’ve changed the main characters many times and switched concepts entirely many times as well. I have this need to make something new, something that hasn’t been done. I just feel like that’s the only accomplishment I’m looking for at this point. As far as writing goes. Being an accomplished successful writer in which my words reach vase audiences would be great although at this point it’s not what would make me feel complete. It’s a struggle I have in which I’m tired of reading the same words in books, and watching them play out as movies. I want a new thought to read and take in and give out. I wonder if anyone else feels that way as a writer? Or just an avid reader, in which they’re just looking for something new that feels impossible in this age of technology? In this world of many movies and many books. Its a struggle to find a new thought and it stops me from completing anything. Thanks for reading my rambles.
-Temperamentally Tina