Conversations don’t connect.

Conversations don’t connect
as if there is a wire in my brain
that has been severed
and no current can get through.
When people speak
the signal is often weak
and my ears they can’t carry all the words
chopping a few through as the rest fall out
and tumble out
never entering my brain.

I feel overwhelmed
trying to fill in the missing words
and then several more voices speak
in crowds I turn weak
trying to keep up.
The words they never make it
and mumbles drift out of my mouth
as the rest stays locked up
as my brain tries to process
and it is never fast enough
slowly churning
most of it is lost
and I begin to panic
and I stop
and turn away.

A struggle to keep up
to process
to listen.
Sometimes I speak
before they are finished
because my brain will forget
quickly every thought
and I’m trying
slowly beneath the rest
with their poised words
and conversationalist skills
as I stare above
down at the bottom
feeling small
and smaller
till I stop talking at all
and I turned to written text.

Thanks for reading.
-Temperamentally Tina